Interview with a person who has long served in the Church

The Church was designed, in part, to function for koinia (fellowship); does it serve this function well or is it lacking?

Generally, the way the American church is set up, I don't think it functions that well at fellowship. Small home groups do somewhat better. But if you get into a larger church with busy American lifestyles, most people stay somewhat superficial. I've never been able to see fellowship as a chili feed after carolling around the neighborhood every Christmas, for instance. Or an ice cream party after the church business meeting. People just chat. Chatting doesn't fit my definition of fellowship.

How does effective communication aid the function and process of koinia?

What is meant by "effective communication"?

What connects and has results.

Generally, people (Americans) don't share their hearts and lives in a deep meaningful way unless they feel safe. And safety is usually built over time and consistency and a small enough group setting. If people take time, yes, effective communication can happen.

What has been your experience in the Church: Does it communicate well (both within and without)?

I was in a small church for years that communicated well on some levels within, but was never very good at communicating without. At least, not communicating in a way that made large numbers of people feel like they were part of it. To this day, as dearly as I love many of the people, they have their own "in" language and culture and have no real idea how very exclusive that makes them appear to others. I know how to speak their language, but after being out of the church for years it kind of makes me gag.

Now I'm involved in a larger mainline church where the pastor struggles constantly with trying to find out how we can effectively impact our world for Jesus. But, to be honest, most of us are extremely busy with jobs and family responsibilities, and after doing our best to live as consistent Christians in those settings, there isn't a lot of energy left over for communicating with each other or for communicating to the community from the setting of the church. And people are so hungry to connect that they'll chatter through a few of the worship songs before getting around to joining the worship.

I really think that if our current church just shut its doors, some missionaries around the world would notice the drop in support and grieve. But I don't think in [my city] would notice. And this is a church that does try.

How might communication improve in the Church?

I think communication improves best in the church when there are committed small group settings ... led by a gifted leader who doesn't rely on videos and study questions. Those have been the church settings where I've opened my heart the best. And to this day the people in the small church where we spent 16 years know me better than anyone at my current church over the last seven years.

How does communication relate to and/or effect community?

True community is built and supported by effective communcation. But it's not just going to happen because of a quick book study (like our church did with a month-long book study on Bill Hybels' book Just Walk Across the Room.) True communication takes lots of time and practice. Hype and gimmick and programs don't cut it.